shirles!

something

Mon, 23 Mar 2009 07:23:50 GMT

hello!

well i got an A on math test! yay! i feel happy now hahah
no.. not really.. im worried about my dog.. just a little bit though

i watched the grudge 3 today and the blue lagoon
the grudge 3 was SOOOOOOOOOO stupid and confusing
gosh

this morning was horrible! i tried sleeping cause i woke up with a headache at like 7.. so i tried going back to sleep but every hour someone would text me or call me... and i still havent replied to any one of them but mu.. hahah i forgot :( or im just too lazy to do it.

i cant believe natasha richardson passed away :(

i just want my sister to come home already..

i wonder if the worlds really going to "end" in 2012.. i know some people dont believe it cause people keep predicting that during this one year we'd be dead and then that year passes and were all still here... but! you never know.. maybe after all those predictions one might eventually be right... thats a scary thought though..

i dont want to work tomorrow

wow its like 1138
why is it so early!!!!

im back!

Thu, 19 Mar 2009 09:04:05 GMT

so.... last week i finally got my period after 3 months of not getting it! i was in so much pain :(

anyway
im glad thats over

i dont know how i did on my math test but i hope i did good
its hard!

work is frustrating.. but im starting to get used to it

school is boring still

life is whatever

hello.

Mon, 09 Mar 2009 06:59:17 GMT

for the past few weeks ive been feeling really down. and i dont know how to get over it or how to deal with it or whatever it is that everyone does.
im hurting and i cant take it anymore hm..

i dont think my relationship with mu is going to get any better.. yeah maybe im being negative about it but its almost 4 years and were still in the same spot as we were in 2 years ago. i dont think its going to change and it probably never will unless something magical happens and changes everything but that most likely will not happen

unkindness

Wed, 04 Mar 2009 08:20:08 GMT

i didnt go to math today... i thought it was kind of pointless.. ugh
well.. i went to history class and all we talked about was pocahontas and how shes this beautiful indian girl when she really isnt.. at least to me.. i didnt even think the cartoon version was any prettier.

so theres this friend that i used to talk to a lot... i guess you can put it that way.. it was fun with the conversations. and how much he used to care.. i dont see him much anymore.. but when i do i feel this rush of anger and this annoyed and sad feeling take over me..i know things will never be the same again.. we dont even talk anymore.

i just want school to be over.

blah

why is everything so hard

im going to sleep..

dearest

Tue, 17 Feb 2009 07:33:52 GMT

so.. i finally finished watching hard candy... that movie was weird... and i dont like the fact that ellen page cut off that guys testicles!! gosh.. now i cant watch juno without thinking about the fact that she cut off some guys things!!!

school started! its been okay.. fast and boring

valentines day was okay.. nothing memorable.. i just stayed home and watched some movies and shows.. did some homework and then went to mus carmeet around 10ish... it was whatever
but!
i did go out on sunday with mu.. we watched friday the 13th at the atlantic edwards.. havent been there for like ever! well anyway that movie sucked so bad it was just sad.. even though its like the number one movie in the box office right now.. it was dumb.. AND they played that stupid music that i hate so much! what else... well its like almost all the other movies.. all the girls that get naked are the ones dying.. and the horny jerks are the ones dying too.

if ANYONE is reading this...

do you think its possible for someone to NOT be jealous? or even have that feeling?

i have to sell some books.. damn it!

i feel like baking tomorrow but i dont want to..
i dont know we'll see.

that 70s show

Wed, 28 Jan 2009 08:54:53 GMT

i dont know.. some stuff's been going on..

i think something happened recently cause now i cant tell the difference from right and wrong..

so today SOMEONE said me and mu were the PERFECT COUPLE.. or at least thats what he thought at first and HAH. wow. no we are definately not the perfect couple and we both know it. and i dont think there is such thing as a perfect couple.. if there is a perfect couple there is definately something up and wrong with them.. i dont know.. maybe you can be the perfect couple.. when you first get together and then after a few years its just whatever or something.. unless you both are willing to work it out.. thats cute.

theres so much drama. even though i got out of this one situation that someone else put me in... i have a weird feeling that i am not fully out of it and at some time i am going to be pulled back in. but im going to fight back if i have to. i have been put in the worst position ever.. or at least it is to me.. but i did make a decision and im happy with it and im sticking with it because it is the right thing to do. if someone gets mad then fine. whatever. i am not going to pick sides. there shouldnt even be a side. nothing even happened! how the fuck did i get in there. ugh.

im worried
about school
and my family
sometimes i feel bad for my mom and just how stressed out she can be some times
i miss my sister
yeah.. i do.

title and registration

Thu, 22 Jan 2009 06:45:15 GMT

so ive been super stressed out about school and stuff

and then today i woke up at 715.. WHICH MEANS IM LATE!
but i wasnt.. so its all good cause we just had to tell our teacher our preview statement and while i was sitting there talking to him he was all "didnt we email each other back and forth? what did i tell you to fix" i said "my conclusionary device" and he said "thats right. if you fixed that and emailed me before last night you wouldnt even have to be here or tomorrow" and i said "damn! are you serious?" and he said "yesss.." soooo i just emailed him my conclusion and he said "sleep in. see you monday"
YESSSS no school for me!
now i just have to prepare my speech for monday.. and knowing me ill probably stress and freak out about it... which is good i guess.. i some how work good under pressure with school stuff

i want to watch a movie right now
but at the same time i want to listen to music so i dont know what i want to do..

maybe ill finish watching that 70s show
i love it when jackie and hyde got together or had their little fling

oh! well i texted jerry to tell him happy birthday
and then after i sent it i realized that his birthdays in february! so i texted him back to say sorry
and he told me that he was watching videos of all of us getting high and that i am missed very much!

okay
so this morning i went to school
and then i came home after like 15 minutes of being in class
and i slept till like 12.. got ready..
then i locked myself out of the house.. yes i know... wtf
i just thought i had my keys in my pocket but it turned out i didnt soooo i had to call my mom cause she went to costco with my granny.. and of course my mom laughed at me and then yelled at me for being careless and so on. i worked.. and then i thought about mus friend doing something super funny and i just started cracking up.. of course my coworkers were like wtf but whatever.

okay i am off to do what i want to doooo
since i dont have to wake up early and shit!

hands away

Tue, 20 Jan 2009 07:20:06 GMT

i was talking to one of my friends on the phone a few days ago..

and we were kind of talking about how after being with someone over a year and a half.. youre just kind of there.(probably not for some people) and to think that there is probably someone by your side that wants to be with you but they cant because you still have this meaningless relationship. and you would never know that they do.. or you probably do know.. i dont know
but if you think about it.. that kind of sucks.. cause if you were in a meaningless relationship then youre just wasting your time when you can have someone better.. if not atleast youre moving on..

i have a feeling todays someones birthday..
i think it might be jerrys birthday?? i dont know.. if it is.. wow..

sometimes reading his blogs cheer me up
just to remind me that i had one good person in my life who didnt use me for anything
and the fact that he was nice enough to walk me home almost every night.

anyway
some stuff has been going on and it sucks because i dont know what to do.. this is some hard ass decision that i have to make.. i dont know

i have a midterm tomorrow

hope i do good

the new year

Wed, 14 Jan 2009 05:09:40 GMT

im still wondering if anyone reads this stuff
id like if someone would just tell me.. like hey! i read your stuff..
or something

so i have a "lesson" speech tomorrow

yep! another one!
and then my midterm's on tuesday.. i dont know if i already typed that on here in my previous entry..

i didnt go to work today.. i took a day off to work on my stupid ass speech thats worth like 100 points! what the hell! i think ill be okay..

oranges reminds me of butterfly wings..

so somethings been bugging me lately.. i think im going to let it go.. its about time i do that.. and i know after a while someone will notice and that person is going to ask me why. and i think they would know why.

ive got a hunger.. twisting my stomach into knots!

eh.. lets see... i have nothing to talk about sooo...

bye!

monday

Tue, 13 Jan 2009 05:13:24 GMT

i love it now

its nice to leave my house everyday and the skies just blue and its warm and sunny.. which means its almost SPRING TIME!!! yay! :) if you havent noticed its not as dark as it used to be when 5 o clock rolls around.. so yepp :)

so speech class!!!.. ugh i really dont like it.. i gave my first speech today and i think i did pretty good.. after this one i think im going to be okay talking in front of the class.. i was SO close to dropping it.. hahah but i didnt! i have to hang in there! my teachers cool!

oh yeah! so theres this guy that ive been thinking about A LOT! like i cant stop thinking about him at all! like when i think about him i just have this pity feeling i guess... so i guess last week i was at elacs health office with one of my friends cause she wanted to take a pregnancy test.. so while im sitting there waiting with her there was this guy sitting next to us.. he was pretty cute i guess and him and his girl friend were talking and she was telling him how he had the symptoms and i kind of glanced at the little brochure type thing she was holding and on there was "Syphillis" and so that guy went in the office and his friend went outside to wait and i was still sitting in the room and he walked out and then went back in.. and then he ran out crying! and then i didnt see him for a while.. then when me and my friend were walking to my car.. i saw him walking back to the office and he was trying to cover his eyes and stuff.. soooo.. maybe its very mean of me or kind of like thinking negatively.. but i think he got syphillis.. and its sad.. like just thinking about it makes me feel really bad... and thankful for not being in his position.. =/

anyway
the other day i was walking around my house and out of nowhere there was this really familiar smell and it just made me feel all warm and happy.. and then i thought of how fun things were and then everyone got involved and someone started telling lies and everything just kind of split. but i guess thats how its suppose to be..

sooo.. i think this years going to be a good year.. im trying to hold myself back from getting my hopes and too excited about this year because whenever i do that something always goes wrong!

i bought the parent trap the other day.. (the one with lindsay lohan) i love that movie! especially when theyre in napa and london!! gosh its so pretty..

and then i live in this crappy town.. but its okay i guess

so i think my moms friend is the BEST example of a crappy asian driver... a few months ago i asked her to move her car (she was in my driveway) so i could leave and she backed out blah blah and then when i was backing out i stopped to check if anyone was going to drive by or not and then i heard this loud bang and that lady just rammed her car into my neighbors trash can.. i mean seriously you cannot miss the trash cans... it was funny though.. anyway i just got home not too long ago and i noticed this car who is parked SUPER far away from the curb and the end of the car is even further from the car and shes one of those people that park in the middle where it makes it impossible for other cars to park... like if she couldve gone up more two cars couldve parked behind her or something... but yeah.. im surprised her cars not banged up or anything..

ugh
im tired of my granny asking me what day it is like i dont even know how she even got to think that its february.. WE GOT HER THOSE CHINESE CALENDARS FOR A REASON!!!! and she never looks at them.. so whatever..